18 months.

it has come to my attention that i am, like, really gayishly obsessed with you. in fact, the word u-haul comes to mind. omg. i can't help but judge myself a little.

but the moment i'm turning red or making a face about how ridiculous this all is - the next moment i'm ooohing and aaahing about my future loft. and your future man cave. in this supa fabulous dreamworld i live in.

shake it off.

the thing is - for some reason i think it's okay to feel this way. maybe it's not entirely a dream.

and this makes me question my sanity. are my feet on the ground? am i seeing straight? is this another round of vertigo, straight to the head?

i have no idea.

these are the things that i think about these days. i don't know if i will suddenly awake from this beautiful dream - only to find myself sitting beside my cat, alone - or if those 18 months will actually come.